Master of my domain (name)

I think I’m just about ready to come out of the blogging closet. Although I’ve had this blog for a little over two years, I’ve never had any issues with harassing commenters or things of that nature. I don’t publicize it, but several of my real life friends have the link and nothing’s stopping them from sharing it. Shoot, even if they did, I’m not in the business of gossip and name calling so there’s no drama to be found. Besides, I can blog under my nickname and still preserve some googlenymity.

Anyway, I started this blog at a different point in my life. I’m still in transition, to be sure, but the title “Maybe So, Maybe No” doesn’t reflect my mindset anymore. I know what I want. I have the end goal in mind–I’m just trying to figure out how to get there. I am much more confident in my own voice and what I have to say. I’m not trying to get more attention, I just want to be represented. I read a lot of great blogs but none of them really represents more than one or two aspects of me. I’m proud of who I am and who I’m becoming, and I’m ready to claim it.

So, within the next month or so this will be merged into a new blog (with notice posted here beforehand, of course). Thanks for reading!

 

A blog about nothing*

Sorry about the long absence. I was in Chicago last week (and we drove all 14 hours…gah!) and I just started moving into my apartment today. But I thought it would be fun to copycat Law School Ninja in honor of the blogaversary that I completely ignored last month.

Top 5 Referrers

Katie Luper
Legal Underground
Keep It Trill
I Don’t Wear Skinny Jeans
Dennis Jansen

Honorable mention goes to Google Reader. Thanks for the links & comments you guys!

Top 5 Posts (not counting the home page)

Eh, what’s the point?: Senioritis-induced ennui at its finest.
The Tyler Perry Question: In which I don’t believe the hype about how Mr. Perry is ruining black cinema.
How do you choose a law school?: Part of a series on how I got to law school.
Dress for Success: Does law school have a dress code? Cuz I’m not ready to turn in my Chucks yet.
My Life Story: Shameless self-indulgence in which I cast the actors for my autobiographical Lifetime movie.

My Favorite Search Terms

Jason’s Lyric: I mentioned this movie in ONE post as a total aside (it was a caption on a picture that’s not even up there anymore) and it’s haunted me ever since. This consistently tops my search term results and I don’t know why!

friend zone ultimatum: Don’t be whored out emotionally, my friends.

number of people you’ve had sex with chart/std risk chart: Glad that I’m educating the people! The More You Know (c) NBC

senioritis: Yeahhh last year was pretty bad in terms of motivation…

Naturi Naughton: What? Oh yeah, I did cast her as Maya in the “My Life Story” post…

The lack of any weird/creepy search terms reassures me that I’m doing  a pretty good job of keeping things PG around here. Googlenymity only goes so far, so I try to keep it clean for the kids. LOL!

*Anybody catch the Seinfeld reference? I’m listening to Wale’s Mixtape About Nothing that’s got a pretty hilarious intro from Julia Louis-Dreyfuss aka Elaine…lol.

 

I’d like to thank the Academy…

Not really. But I would like to take a moment to acknowledge Kit, author of Letters to a Young Person of Color and Keep It Trill, two outstanding blogs that I read regularly. She received a Beautiful Blogger award and passed it on to me:

So of course I had to publicly thank her. Whenever someone outside of my friends says I’ve done a good job on a post it’s like getting a gold star in kindergarten! So here’s a bit about myself.

I write because I love words. I admire a well turned phrase the way other people admire body parts. I love how that you can tell a story so many different ways–with neatly packaged conciseness or with evocative prose. Even when I’m not writing, I’m thinking of ways to tell the stories of my life in an entertaining way. Even though I don’t get a huge amount of traffic, I still find it gratifying to see that there are people who enjoy reading what I have to say. It reassures me that my dreams of being an author one day aren’t ridiculous!

I started this blog because there were things I wanted to say that I didn’t feel like sharing with my government name attached–people I haven’t seen since high school graduation, family members and coworkers don’t necessarily need to know how I feel about dating, religion or politics–and since I want to be a lawyer, publicly discussing some things could be a potential conflict of interest with my job. An anonymous blog keeps my online identity professional

That’s all for now, but I’ll take questions if you have any! Thanks again, Kit

 

Attention Lurkers!

Dear readers,

I know you’re out there.

I have a handy dandy statistics widget on my dashboard that tells me how many views per day I get, and while I don’t have a huge following, I’m comfortably in the double digits for everything I post. So do me a favor and comment. It doesn’t have to be a profound speech or anything, but comments make me happy, no matter how old the post is (I’ve got some real gems in the archives, by the way…check it out). It may not be immediately but I will get back to you! And if you just aren’t ready to come out of lurkerdom yet, do me a favor and recommend this blog to a friend if you like it.

Anyways, enjoy your holiday season! I’m in Texas with Mr. Man right now but I’ll be back after New Year’s. Cheers!

 

Yes, I’m still alive

Even though I am buried under a pile of work. My environmental history professor is ticking me off right now–I got back the rough draft of my final paper and she lit it up! Not that my writing was bad, but she found a gazillion extra things for me to research. It is 3:04pm Monday. That paper is due 5:00pm Thursday and I have two final exams to prepare for and take between now and then. And she really expects me to go all in depth? I can only put so much information in 8-10 pages, not to mention that she waited until November 23rd (yes, the week of Thanksgiving) to actually assign this ish. And gave us a very involved group project too that was due today. It’s times like these where I just say really?!? I’m sure I’ll have to deal with these types of challenges in the workplace but at least I’ll be getting paid for my blood, sweat and tears!

School, I really hate you sometimes.

Now let me stop wasting to time and get back to work so I can graduate. Don’t fret, I will be back with real posts soon!

 

Why Brownbelle?

If any of you have paid close attention, you’ll see that my blog alias is Brownbelle. The reason for this name is twofold- first, I’m a classic Southern belle and I happen to be black. Second, one of my favorite Disney movies is Beauty and the Beast because Belle is the heroine I relate to most out of all of them. Sure, Jasmine was feisty, Megara was sarcastic, Mulan was principled and Pocahontas was Native American (I’m part Creek). But Belle was a voracious reader on close terms with the local bookseller, loyal to her family, intelligent, witty, a hopeless romantic and more stubborn than was good for her. She also wanted to see the world outside her small town, didn’t quite fit in and had a suitor who pursued her continually despite their obvious incompatibility. EXACTLY like me!  (Frankly, Mr. Man can be rather princely himself but reminds me of the Beast when he gets grouch …) The lyrics to her theme song could be my theme song (minus the French part, of course). I’ve provided the lyrics and a link to the song for your enjoyment. Happy weekend!

\”Belle\” sung by Susan Egan

Belle:
Little town, it’s a quiet village
Every day like the one before
Little town full of little people
Waking up to say…

Townsfolk:
Bonjour
Bonjour
Bonjour
Bonjour
Bonjour

Belle:
There goes the baker with his tray, like always
The same old bread and rolls to sell
Every morning just the same
Since the morning that we came
To this poor provincial town

Baker:
Good morning, Belle
Belle:
Good morning monsieur
Baker:
Where are you off to?
Belle:
The bookshop, I just finished the most wonderful story
about a beanstalk, and an ogre, and a—
Baker: That’s nice. MARIE! The baguettes, hurry up!

Townsfolk:
Look, there she goes the girl is strange, no question
Dazed and distracted, can’t you tell?
Never part of any crowd, cause her head’s up on some cloud
No denying she’s a funny girl, that Belle

Man 1: bonjour
Woman 1: good day
Man 1: How is your family?
Woman 2: Bonjour
Man 2: Good day
Woman 2: How is your wife?
Woman 3: I need….six eggs
Man 3: That’s too expensive!

Belle: There must be more than this provincial life!

Bookseller: Ah, Belle!
Belle: Good morning. I’ve come to return the book I borrowed
Bookseller: Finished already?
Belle: Oh I couldn’t put it down. Have ya got anythin’ new?
Bookseller: (chuckle) Not since yesterday
Belle: That’s alright. I’ll borrowww, this one
Bookseller: That one? but you’ve read it twice!
Belle: Well it’s my favorite- far off places,
daring sword fights, magic spells, a prince in disguise!
Bookseller: If you like it all that much it’s yours!
Belle: But sir?!?
Man: I insist!
Belle: Well thank you, thank you very much!

Townsfolk:
Look, there she goes, that girl is so peculiar
I wonder if she’s feeling well
With a dreamy, far-off look
And her nose stuck in a book
What a puzzle to the rest of us is Belle

Belle:
Ohhhhhh….isn’t this amazing?
It’s my favorite part because….you’ll see
Here’s where she meets Prince Charming
But she won’t discover that it’s him, till chapter three

Woman:
Now it’s no wonder that her name means “beauty”
Her looks have got no parallel

Shopkeeper:
But behind that fair facade
I’m afraid she’s rather odd
Very different from the rest of us

Townsfolk:
She’s nothing like the rest of us
yes, different from the rest of us is Belle

Lefou: wow you didn’t miss a shot gaston!
you’re the greatest hunter in the whole world!
Gaston:I know
Lefou: No beast alive stands a chance against you, haha…and
no girl for that matter
Gaston: It’s true lefou, and I’ve got my sight set on that one
Lefou: T-the inventor’s daughter!?
Gaston: She’s the one, the lucky girl I’m going to marry
Lefou: But she’s–
Gaston: The most beautiful girl in town
Lefou: I know–
Gaston: That makes her the best! and don’t I derseve the best?
Lefou: Well of couse, I mean ya do, but I (mumbling)
Gaston: Right from the moment when I met her, saw her
I said she’s gorgeous and I fell
Here in town it’s only she, who’s as beautiful as me
So I’m making plans to woo and marry Belle

Silly Girls:
Look there he goes! Isn’t he dreamy?
Monsieur Gaston! Oh,he’s so cute!
Be still my heart! I’m hardly breathing!
he’s such a tall, dark, strong, and hansome brute!

Man1:bonjour
Gaston: Pardon!
Man2: Good day
Man3: Mais oui!
Matron: You call this bacon?
Woman1: What loveley grapes!
Man4: Some cheese…
Woman2:…Ten yards!
Man4:…One pound..
Gaston:`Scuse me!
Cheese merchant: I’ll get the knife
Gaston: Please let me through!!
Woman1: This bread…
Man5: Those fish…..
Woman1:…It’s stale
Man5:…They smell!
Baker: Madame’s mistaken!

Belle: there must be more than this provincial life!

Gaston: just watch….I’m going to make Belle my wife!

Townsfolk:
Look there she goes….a girl who’s strange but special
A most peculiar mademoiselle
It’s a pity and a sin
She doesn’t quite fit in
Cause she really is a funny girl
A beauty but a funny girl
She really is a funny girl…..that Belle!!

(random “bonjour”s)

 

Careful, you might end up in my novel!

The concept of disclosure has been plaguing writers forever. Whether you write books, poetry, songs or keep a blog, you inevitably run across the question of how much is too much? Even when you cleverly disguise the truth under a veil of “fiction”, it leaks out. A classic example of this is the movie The Best Man, in which writer Harper Stewart publishes his great American novel only to wreak havoc upon his close friends due to its biographical nature. Basically, his best friend from college, Lance was finally marrying his sweetheart Mia. Lance was a football player in college and took full advantage of his groupie love, which caused a lot of tension between him and Mia. She even broke up with him for a little while and during this breakup Mia and Harper shared an intimate moment. Lance, thinking that he was the only man Mia had ever been with goes totally haywire and almost decides not to marry her, but common sense prevails. (This is a great movie by the way, and the secondary plot lines dealing with the rest of Harper’s friends are equally engaging).

In our new digital age, blogs are a special case. Much of their appeal stems from the fact that they are relatable. The reader knows that behind the post there is a living, breathing person who has written down their hopes, dreams, struggles, quirks and frustrations, often in real time. It’s a lot more interactive than a book and a lot more personal. Of course there is an eternal debate on anonymity versus full disclosure. I obviously toe the line of anonymity–there are enough identifying details in my writing that anyone who is reasonably well acquainted with me could figure it out, and I’m okay with that. I just wouldn’t want to put my government name and ALL the details of my life out there for any old stranger to gawk at. This blog is a creative outlet for me more so than an attempt to market myself as a product for consumption. Recently one of my friends realized just how personal this blog is–I can’t very well write about my life without sometimes writing about the people in it–and felt somewhat betrayed.

To this person I apologize for any hurt feelings I may have caused. However, I stand by what I have written. I try not to write about things that are not somewhat generally known. I’ll explain that my college population is about 6% African-American. Roughly two-thirds of that 6% participates in black student organizations, and if you have ever walked into the tutoring office, the BSO office, attended an event or club meeting, you are officially known and your business is too. We never have as much privacy as we think we do. If you have a Facebook/Twitter/MySpace account–hell, if you even have FRIENDS–there is a 99% chance that someone outside of your immediate circle knows something about your life. Now we pretend that it isn’t that way for the sake of our peace of mind, but that doesn’t change the situation.

Lastly, I promise that every word I write has been well thought out. I rarely just write and publish; something may linger for days as a draft before I deem it ready for viewing. So this blog is not a tool for any sort of revenge or validation, it’s just one girl’s thoughts on this crazy world.

Cheers, and thanks for reading!

 

Allow me to reintroduce myself

Hi everybody,

Thanks for following me to WordPress. From now on I’m going to try to make things more interesting with pictures, videos, etc. so stay tuned! There’s lots more to come.

 

My Boyfriend’s Back

Well not yet, but his plane arrives in approximately 8 and a half hours….so I’m going on hiatus for the rest of the week. Mind you I also have to register for classes because school starts Monday, and with that my life will resume its usual frenetic pace. As a result the blog will be on a reduced posting schedule when I return. I’ll try my hardest to post at least once a week–hopefully twice–but I do hope you’ll continue reading. Ta-ta for now, dear readers!

P.S. If you need any entertainment in the meantime, check out my blogroll.

 

There’s No Place Like Home

I’m FINALLY back in the AAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!
Can you tell I’m excited? I came back and saw all my family, and my dad even had a welcome back cookout for me. It was so nice to be back in my element! All I can do is sigh with contentment. I’ve slept sooo much, I didn’t even realize how tired I was. Part of it was probably just a food coma from eating all that delectable homecooked food again! Groceries were so expensive in DC that I basically made the same 3 meals over and over again because anything with more than 3 ingredients just cost too much. My checking account is almost tapped out right now, thank goodness my mom and dad bought me some groceries. I only need to pick up some milk, chicken and fish at the store and I’ll be set for the next couple of weeks! I love how far my dollar goes in Georgia

That’s all for right now…check back for a “real” post tomorrow.