My hair isn't this big (yet!) but with the highlights I'm definitely channeling Ms. Foxy. LOL!
I know I already wrote a post on natural hair in the past week but that was before I wore my afro for the first time. And let me just say…I LOVE IT! I love my hair. I finally understand why it never seemed to want to lay down straight–because it’s meant to be a glorious cloud of kinky curly cottony goodness.
Now, I’m not going to become that person who turns her nose up at girls who wear relaxers or weaves and wax sermonic about embracing your Blackness. Every woman should wear her hair in a way that maximizes her own enjoyment of it. Still, I think every black woman should wear her hair natural at some point in her conscious life. I say that because, if you got your first perm before you were in the first grade OR your mom was like mine and pressed it every week, you probably don’t remember what your natural hair texture is like.
I remember before I went natural, I was infuriated by the suggestion that something as superfluous as hair could be that important. I wasn’t about to come out the house looking crazy every day, and my perm was “more manageable”. I could never picture myself rocking a ‘fro before because I thought it was too out there for my personality/style but you know what I found out? An afro goes just as well with khakis & a polo shirt as it does with a turban & dashiki. And you truly don’t realize the extent to which you internalize mainstream concepts of beauty until you start going against the grain. Don’t get me wrong, the transitioning process wasn’t all sunshine & roses. I had more than my fair share of bad hair days and feeling just plain unpretty. But I had to ask myself why? Does the fact that my hair doesn’t lay down flat and straight change my face? Does it change who I am? Not at all! But there was a small part of me that thought my natural hair wouldn’t be good enough. There are those who say “natural hair ain’t for everybody”. About half of them mean that the style, upkeep & maintenance changes aren’t to everyone’s preferences, and I’d agree with that– you have to be ready to embrace that or you won’t be happy with it. But the other half of that faction thinks that anybody whose strays out of curly territory and into kinky/nappy needs to slap a perm on it.
The thing is that hair complexes, just like skin complexes, are very real. Black women are constantly getting messages that we aren’t good enough–we’re too big, loud, aggressive, curvy, sexual, etc, etc. But with the aid of a weave or relaxer, at the very least every Black girl can achieve a head full of silky, blow in the breeze, whippable hair. It’s a security blanket that many are afraid to let go, and that’s completely understandable. But nothing worthwhile comes easy and on the other side, there are endless benefits to be had. I finally realized that I do, in fact, have wash & wear hair. I don’t have to fight back tears while trying to comb it, or spend 45 minutes with the flat iron in the morning, or sleep on rollers every night to make it look “presentable”. I just spritz it with moisturizer, fluff and go! I don’t shed hairs like a dog. And I take pride in the fact that my hair is not only beautiful, but 100% organic.
I guess I did get on my soapbox a little, but I don’t mean to down relaxed or weaved up girls. Rather, as someone who once thought going natural was totally not for me, I hope this lets you all know that if you’re questioning whether or not to take the leap–do it! You just might fall in love.
